~J'adore la Musique~

Saturday, August 29, 2009

\\*Bored, Depressed, Lonely*//

I'm back... Feeling so tired now. I haven't finished my A Maths homework. I really don't know how others do well in A Maths. It's so complicated. At least E Maths is easier. I have been listening to music for the whole day, sitting in front of the computer, staring into space. I have nobody, nobody with me. Life alone is depressing. You'll see your mood change from a happy one to a very very horribly depressing one. Especially at night. The effect comes on full blast. I talked to myself already, when I was doing the English assignment, but now, I have totally no idea what to ask myself. My neighbours must think I'm mad or something. That's the funny thing. I dropped so many things and nearly got myself into hospital I think. I think all the neighbours heard crashes and ows the whole day. It's a good thing I'm still alive and typing though. My mum says I have to finish my homework by today. I figured I'd better do so before the whole family comes back tomorrow. There's one thing I like about living all alone. I don't know what it is. I can just sit down alone, anywhere at home and brood over things that's totally unnecessary to brood over. I think I got it. When you're all alone, you have unlimited space to think endlessly. To think of lots of things, lots of possibilities. You get to sigh and feel depressed without having anybody to come over and interrogate you as if you had commited murder. However, as much as I enjoy living my emo life, I do want people in it. I need them. Or else I'm going to go crazy soon and you'll see me at IMH.

I actually cooked dinner just now. A tiny portion of it is being corroded by my gastric juice while the other part is lying snugly in the fridge. I was so satisfied with it. Creamy mushroom and onion pasta. It's those packet things so the only things I had to do were to add water, milk and butter - it's so hard to cut butter - , boil the whole mixture, stir and add in the ingredients. I only ate a few mouthfuls then realised it was too creamy. I could gulp down a whole packet of apple juice though. Well, here I am, late in the night. I can't believe how I'm able to just sit down here the whole day in front of the computer. Time really flies.

Teared On|8:07 AM|